Too much tv

Having a couple of kids in the house means that I'm subjected to quite a bit of underage programming. We try not to let the kids watch too much tv, but sometimes we need a break (or need to take a shower) and a tv serves as a great babysitter for an hour or so. I was watching Veggie Tales on Saturday and started thinking about what it takes to make a great kids tv show. I decided to rate the different shows that our kids watch. Here they are:

1. The Wiggles: A

This is by far the most watchable out of all of my sons' tv shows. Admittedly, the concept doesn't sound great: four grown men dress up in four different colors and dance and sing. Sometimes they are accompanied by a pirate with a feather as a weapon, a dog, a dinosaur, or an octopus with a shaky voice. Yet, this show works because the guys look like they are having a great time doing what they are doing. Some of them can't dance (Jeff/Purple) or look a little too "Australian" (Murray/Red), but it doesn't matter because they are entertaining. And yes, I do have a favorite song: Big Red Car (toot toot chugga chugga big red ca-ha-ha). I also have a favorite Wiggle: Anthony, the blue Wiggle. I had a chance to take my oldest son to see them not too long ago, but we were out of town. I was actually a little disappointed.

2. The Backyardigans: B

I had my doubts about this show after I heard the different characters' names, including Tyrone, Uniqua, Pablo, and Tasha, but man the songs are catchy. I don't know how many times I've gone to work singing "a pirate, a pirate, a pirate says arrrhhhh." Man, I love that episode. I am also a big fan of "Surf's Up." My son's favorite episode is "Legend of the Volcano Sisters." The show isn't great and sometimes the characters dance just a little too much, but the songs make watching the show worth it.

3. SpongeBob Squarepants: B+

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? My son has been a little late getting into this show mainly because my wife absolutely hates it. I think she still gets a little upset when I turn it on, but I guess she figures that it's inevitable. SpongeBob reminds me of a less-funny version Ren and Stimpy. It has it's moments, but I always think that it could be just a little bit funnier if they put more effort into it. I would just give it a solid B, but the opening sequence where he gets in the tub and his head fills up with water gets me every time.

4. The Doodlebops: F

My kids don't watch this show because my wife and both really, really dislike it. You know those kids in high school who were just a little too into theater? Well, you can catch them now on the Doodlebops. In a Simpsons episode not too long ago Milhouse wanted to know if he could watch the Doodlebops on tv. I guess even the writers for the Simpsons have a strong dislike of three weirdos dressing up in ugly costumes and pretending to play instruments. DEEDEE! ROONEY! MOE! GAY!

5. The Wonder Pets: C-

Here's the story: three animals (a turtle, a duck, and some sort of gerbil) go out and help animals that are in danger. I'm not sure how this idea was pitched to Disney, but it seems like it would be a pretty tough sell. The show is animated, sort of. The characters are all cut outs of real pictures and they just try and animate their arms and mouths. It's kind of creepy, actually, but not as creepy as the little duck named "Ming Ming."

6. Little Einsteins: B-

I think this show is great for kids. It teaches them about classical music, astronomy, artists, etc., but there is something about this show that I can't get with. Maybe it's because they ask too many questions of the audience. Will our clapping really help out Rocket? What about Little Totem Pole? I think the main problem I have with this show is the theme song. If you hear it once in the morning, I promise you that you will be singing it all day.

I've left out some other shows, but it's time to move on to a some random thoughts:

1. When I was younger, I would practice walking around my house without making any noise. I memorized which stairs creaked and where to walk on the wood floor so it wouldn't crack. I also learned that linoleum is soundproof. I'm not sure why I did this, but even today I will try and do it. This little game of my doesn't mesh well with a skittish wife. I've scared my wife so many times walking around the house that now when I know she is there, I have to start sniffing like I have a cold when I'm about to enter a room she is in. Either that or I just announce "I'm about to walk into the kitchen." I told her before that when she is in the house just to expect that I'll walk into the room she is in at any minute, but that never really worked out for her.

2. I loved this commercial when it came out and I still love it:



Everytime I see the guy hit the bed I start cracking up.

3. I watched "Victoria Beckham: Coming to America" and I loved it. More out that another time though.

4. Bobby Flay once said that heirloom tomatoes are the most flavorful, so I decided to plant some along with a bunch of other varieties of tomatoes. After eating a ton of them, I'm inclined to agree. However, heirlooms are an ugly tomato. They look like one tomato is trying to grow out from the inside of another tomato. I wonder if anyone has ever tried to create a tomato that tastes like a heirloom, but has the more pleasant appearance of a golden boy, an early girl, or a beefsteak. Maybe I should drop out of law school and go back to Davis and study agriculture.

5. The Orangesicle shake from Carl's Jr. is surprisingly delicious.

Foreign Music Friday

My choice for this Foreign Music Friday is the song "Esperanza" by Enrique Iglesias. When this song came out and when I originally heard it, Enrique Iglesias wasn't well known in the US. I think his first popular song here was "Bailamos" which came out a couple of years after this was released. This song was released on the album "Cosas del Amor" which is E.I.'s best album by far (yes, I'm proud to admit that I own a few of his other albums). His English music is ok, but if you can look past his gay Spanish accent, you'll notice that his Spanish music is on a whole different level.

Dreams do come true

It's like looking into a mirror.

Check out www.simpsonizeme.com

Foreign Music Friday

This is the first installment of "Foreign Music Friday." I would say that most Americans are pretty ignorant when it comes to music made outside of the US. I know I was prior to my two year sojourn in Central America.

Usually when someone says "Hey, you should check out band X" you never end up doing it. Why? Well, if you are like me than you feel like you don't have enough time to listen to the bands that you do like, let alone new bands that you probably won't like. I've decided now that when someone says "check out this band" I will definitely do it. My brother wanted me to check out the new Silverchair album for some reason and I actually did it (even though I didn't really like it that much).

My first entry comes from England. The song is "Gangsters" by the Specials. As you can see from the comments, the video is from 1979. This is two-tone ska at its best.

What?

I was just going through my stack of things to work on, and these are the instructions the attorney gave me for one of my projects:

"Also do a deed + to the ltd partnership for the irrevocable trust dog deed to the trustee of the trust."

I don't know what that means, other than I'm going to work on something else until he can explain what he wrote to me.

Message received at...

Whenever I am "chatting" with someone online, I always wonder what it looks like where they are sitting. I've also heard that you can tell a lot about a person just by looking at their workspace. So I decided to take a picture of my desk and share with you this so you can see where I spend Mondays through Fridays from 8:30 to 5:00. I've numbered random things, and although they numbers are a bit hard to see, I'll explain each one.

1. This is our incredible fax machine. The best part about this treasured office machine is that the automatic feeder doesn't really work, so when the boss (who may or not be my dad) decides that he needs to send a 15 page fax, guess who gets to sit there and feed each page separately into the machine? Yours truly. Both the secretary (who may or may not be my mom) and I have asked for a new fax machine, but the boss is holding out for some reason. I think he takes some sick pleasure in the fact that the fax machine doesn't work very well.

2. Number 2 is my lovely computer, which I purchased right before I began law school. It's a Dell Inspiron 700m and the reason I purchased it is because it was the smallest one they had at the time (12.1 inches). On my desktop is a picture of my baseball hero, Sandy Koufax. In my home I have five other pictures of Sandy Koufax, including one that's autographed. Anyway, my computer has held up pretty well, but the "s" button is starting to flame out on me. I wonder if there is a way to make this key more sensitive so I don't have to hit it so hard everytime I touch it.

3. What would a nice workspace be without a Far Side calendar? I complained to the secretary about her choice of calendar (it had to do with "special sayings for women." No joke.) so she went out and bought me the Far Side one sometime in February. Since it was so late, it was only a buck. What a great deal.

4. Here's the keyboard to the desktop which I try to use as little as possible because I don't really fit under it. The desk is only about 3 1/2 or 4 ft tall, and the keyboard hangs under it so when I type there, I don't even try and put my legs under the desk.

5. My phone and my keys. I actually just got a new phone because my razr kicked the bucket. The battery stopped working literally two weeks after the warrant had run out on it. I bought another batter and that one didn't work, so it was time for a new phone. Usually I'm pretty excited, but this time there wasn't anything that I was really interested in. I ended up getting a krazr (sp?). It's ok. I'm just praying that when it breaks (because I know it will) that it does so within a year from now.

6. These are my time sheets. Everytime I stop work or switch clients, I have to start filling out the time sheet and write in exactly what I'm working on. It is a huge hassle. I look back fondly on my days working at the "retirement community" where I swiped a card when I showed up and swiped a card when I left.

7. Typical file folder. I was working on a set of special interrogatories at the time. Here is my favorite paragraphed that I typed:

13.  The terms "RELATE TO" and "RELATING TO" shall
mean regarding, concerning, referring to,
constituting, memorializing, depicting, mentioning,
specifying, listing, summarizing, reviewing,
identifying, establishing, evidencing, supporting,
describing, recording, embodying, studying, analyzing
or discussing.

If there is one thing I love about the legal profession, it's the insane amount of wordiness, which I'm pretty sure isn't a word, but it's the best word that I could come up with right now.

8. This is a Charlie Brown Christmas snow globe. I'm not sure why it's still up, but we put it there before Christmas 2006 and never took it down. It's also nice to have when my oldest boy comes to the office and needs something to play with.

9. Another file that I was using as a reference.

10. A picture of my sister and her oldest kid when she was a newborn. I'm not sure why it's taped to the base of the monitor, but I guess that is where the secretary wanted it.

Anyway, there's a brief tour of my workspace for you. Besides the lack of space on the desk, it's really not so bad sitting there all day. If only we could get a new fax machine...

Famous

Yesterday I went down to Hollywood with my brother and his wife to act like tourists and check out the walk of fame and people watch. I realized a few things while I was down there:

1. I really do enjoy doing tourist-y things.
2. Pink's has delicious hot dogs (I got the spicy Chicago sausage AND the bacon and chili dog). I'm overweight going on obese.
3. I would like to live in Los Angeles.
4. I've met a few "celebrities" in my day.

The reason I started thinking about celebrities was because of the weird look-a-like people that hang out around the Chinese theater and take pictures with Japanese tourists. You know, Marilyn Monroe, Elvis, Pinhead, Freddy Krueger, Spiderman, etc etc. Anyway, I mentally compiled a list of celebrities that I've met (and by "met" I mean, I came within 5-10 feet of that person, and this list doesn't include athletes or musicians), and here's my list of who and where:

1. Richard Dreyfuss (Border's in Montclair. I was pretty excited because I loved his character in "American Graffitti.")
2. The blind kid from Dumb and Dumber (Lindsey's house. He was playing Nintendo with her brother I think)
3. Scott Bakula (Filming Quantum Leap in Claremont)
4. Drew Carey (Also at Border's in Montclair. He was doing a book signing)
5. Marshall from Alias (Dodger game)
6. Coolio (SLC airport)
7. Guy with the long hair from Guatemalan super-group Contacto

Not a bad compilation of D-list celebrities, right? There might be more, but I can't think of them right now. However, there is one celebrity that I just recently met that I am more excited about than the rest of the others combined. Not only did I meet this celebrity, but I also rubbed his tummy and felt his furry head. Here he is:



No, I didn't meet Weird Al, I met the dog on the cover of this album. Turns out he is the pet of a guy I go to school with. Let's just say this was the friendliest/scariest-looking dog I have ever met, and the first celebrity that I have ever scratched behind the ear.

On a different subject, I went and saw "Transformers" this weekend and it was the first movie I've seen this summer that didn't disappoint. In fact, it was way better than I imagined it would be. The last time I was ever really blown away by the special effects in a movie was in Jurassic Park. Well, maybe it was in the second X-Men movie where Nightcrawler is about to attack the president at the opening of the movie. Either way, I thought the special effects in Transformers were absolutely incredible. Not only that, but the movie was hilarious. Shia LeBouf is a great actor. I hadn't seen him in a movie since "Holes" (which was also a great movie), but I look forward to seeing whatever movie he makes next. Actually, I think his next movie is the new Indiana Jones film. Should be good.

Anyway, I need to get back to the Dodgers game. I'll try and update more frequently.